


Worn Like Armor

by makeit_takeit



Series: Missing Scenes [7]
Category: Band of Brothers
Genre: Friends to Lovers, Getting Together, M/M, Post-Canon, Post-Series, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-10
Updated: 2017-10-10
Packaged: 2019-01-15 13:49:26
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,060
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12322296
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/makeit_takeit/pseuds/makeit_takeit
Summary: Post-“Points”. When the war is over.There’s no shame between them, not after what they’ve seen, what they’ve done. Emotion is what makes them human, what lets them know they’re still alive, not black and dead and broken off inside like some burned up, blown out tree stump.





	Worn Like Armor

Dick is laying on his side, Lew laying face down beside him. They’re both naked as sin, with the curtains back and the moonlight pouring in. And Dick is starting to get used to this, to Nix – naked, close, sharing his bed and his body; used to his touch and his kiss and the sound of his voice when it’s low and throaty and almost choked by desire. It’s been long enough now, it’s starting to sink in, to seem, well. _Normal_.

He knows he’s letting his guard down, bit by bit, his stiff exterior relaxing, tightly wound inner workings unwinding. He knows he’s less and less cautious about what he says and how he says it, what he does and when he does it. He knows the barriers between them, whatever barriers there ever were, are one sided, are held in place by his own cautious and reserved nature, and Lew has always laid himself bare, at least to Dick. But Dick’s defenses, the aloof separateness he has worn like armor, its eroding day by day, and Lew is coming closer and closer, and Dick knows one day there will be nothing left between them, no reserve, no caution, no armor, not even skin, and they’ll have merged into one, and he sees it coming and he’s not even trying to fight it.

He knows he’s letting his guard down, but he isn’t quite prepared for it when Lew’s sleepy voice reaches out of the dark and asks,

_What are you doing?_

And Dick looks down, and realizes to his complete and utter shock that he’s been lazily tracing the contours of Nix’s back, the shadowed hollows with the smooth skin gleaming in the moonlight, softly, lightly. Gently, and maybe. Maybe even lovingly. And he’s been caught, and he finds that he doesn’t even care. He doesn’t pull his hand away, doesn’t even stop. He just smiles in the dark.

_Reconnaissance._

_Planning an attack?_

_That’s classified._

_Maybe gonna draw a map?_

_Safer to commit it to memory._

_Should I be offended that it’s not already committed to memory?_

_What, your back?_

_Considering I could have drawn a map of your entire body from memory by the 3 rd week of OCS._

Now Dick’s hand stops in its tracks, lifts from the warm skin beneath it entirely of its own volition. He feels his face flush, burning in the moonlight. His throat feels too tight, constricted, and he feels himself tense instinctively. Lew just laughs.

_Sorry, am I supposed to pretend this is a new development?_

_Uh. No, no. I just._

_What? Didn’t know I wanted to jump your bones the day I met you?_

Dick feels the knot in his throat thicken, turns his face away from the window so the light doesn’t reveal the bright hot blood that’s rushing more and more insistently to his face. He clears his throat, and Lew laughs again.

_Didn’t know that?_

_Uh, no. No, I didn’t know that._

_You were just so._ Earnest _. So straight laced and buttoned down. With your shirt starched and your pants creased and your boots shined. Not a hair out of place. Just made me want to_. Y’know _._

_I guess I don’t, Nix._

_Loosen you up._

_And that’s a euphemism._

_Give the man a prize._

_The day we met, you say._

_Never under estimate the appeal of sullying the unsullied, Dick. One look at you and all I could think was how you’d look once you were._ Debauched _._

_Debauched?_

_That’s right._

_Debauched._

_I’ve passed a lot of time in fox holes, a lot of time in a rocky jeep, Dick, by imagining what you would look like_ debauched _._

Dick is silent, and Nix laughs again.

_Am I embarrassing you?_

_To say the least._

_Ah, it’s good for you. Everybody needs to hear how irresistible they are, sometimes._

And Dick knows Nix doesn’t mean it like that; he’s not fishing, he’s not trying to push Dick to return the favor, not trying to extract compliments or flattery. He’s just stating a fact, and it’s a fact Dick knows is all too true. Especially men like them, men who push themselves too hard, too far, who blame themselves when there’s no one to blame, who dwell on their own shortcomings, wear their faults and failures on their sleeves like insignia, for the world to see and judge.

If anyone needs to hear that he’s wanted. That he’s needed. That someone doesn’t want to – can’t – live without him. That flaws and all, he is loved -.

_You know, Nix -._

_Don’t, Dick. I didn’t mean it like that._

_I know you didn’t._

_Then shut up._

_No._

Nix laughs again, raises his head.

_No?_

_You heard me._

_Okay then._

And now he’s looking at Dick, expectant and grateful at once. Dick lets his hand fall back down, lets his fingertips trace along Nix’s back, up his spine to his neck, tangle in his hair.

_I didn’t think about this – about anything like this – on the day we met. I couldn’t draw you from memory when we were back in OCS. I never thought about how you might look after – but then considering how debauched you look when you’ve tied one on, maybe I already knew that didn’t I?_

_Guess maybe you did._

_But you were the reason I joined the airborne, and the reason I wanted to do my best every day. You were the reason I worried about staying safe, the reason I kept it together, stayed focused. You were the reason I stayed sane. You were the reason I fought this damned war. You didn’t start out that way, Lew, but that’s how it ended up. You’re what I’ve been fighting for all along._

Lew turns his face away, and Dick knows why. But there’s no shame between them, not after what they’ve seen, what they’ve done. Emotion is what makes them human, what lets them know they’re still alive, not black and dead and broken off inside like some burned up, blown out tree stump. So Dick rubs his fingers along Lew’s scalp, traces the line of his jaw and turns his face back toward the light.

_It’s true, you know._

_I know, Dick._

And Nix’s eyes are shining wetly out from the shadows of his face, and his mouth tics up on one side in a smile.

_I know._


End file.
